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  • [in the voice of sebastian the crab] undah da tree
  • I too went to a horse race 2 weeks ago
  • im pro life, and I’m conflicted, and I think that’s a good thing. And I think the more questions we ask ourselves and our fellow Americans despite what we believe or what we think we know, the better off we’ll all be. I wrote a blog post for the first time in forever and I hope you’ll read it, even if you hate me after. Link in bio, read before bitching. And I’d also encourage you to go over to @backinfebruary_ to read a unique, refreshing, balanced and most importantly compassionate perspective from a single mother that became pregnant unexpectedly.
  • The dress: $6 the pizza I ate in it: $14 realizing that if I go on enough weird bumble dates I’ll probably write a book and become exorbitantly wealthy: priceless
  • Counting down the days until no one in the continental US can contact me unless I have WiFi and I’m blacked out on a beach somewhere getting burnt to a crisp in Caribbean sun
  • Remember when our parents told us not to talk to people on the internet and I live with someone I met on FB and I’m going to a wedding for someone I met on insta lol
  • Found my Barbie dream house right off of U street 🥰
  • I work hard because I have a dream of stacking hundreds on each blade of a ceiling fan above my bed (that will be mostly ornamental because I’ll have central air) and making it rain

© 2019 The Pretty Patriot