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I’m Not A Feminist

I’ve been rather reluctant to voice my opinions on feminism, given the radical and aggressive attitude becoming more and more popular within the movement. But I have things to say that I think people should hear. If people choose to attack me rather than try to civilly explain and defend their points of view, so be it.

imageAs much as feminists like to repeat the dictionary definition of feminism, I believe that feminism’s popularity (especially on tumblr where the vast majority of users are under the age of 25) has a lot more to do with young women struggling with their identities, self acceptance and a desire for validation than gender inequality.

imageFeminists have expressed outrage over articles written by men that criticize popular trends worn by women (like high waisted shorts) and have crucified Vine star Nash Grier for talking about qualities and habits he finds attractive in women (like shaving their arm hair). I hate cargo shorts. I also prefer men with minimal facial hair. An opinion isn’t always oppression.

imageFeminism declares that women should be able to sleep with as many people as they want without consequence or ridicule. A woman’s sex life is her personal choice, and it’s unfair that a promiscuous woman is treated much differently by society than a promiscuous man. However, different qualities are encouraged and discouraged in each gender, and both men and women are benefited and disadvantaged by them. What’s important is that people don’t use a woman’s promiscuity as a justification for her harassment, mistreatment or rape, but it’s ridiculous to demand everyone condone a certain lifestyle or hold it in a high esteem.

imageFeminists scoff at the idea of the friend zone, and portray it as men feeling entitled to women’s bodies. The friend zone exists and there are just as many women in it as men. The friend zone is the state of romantic desire for someone that only has platonic feelings for you, and while it’s no excuse to lash out at the person that’s not interested in pursuing a romantic/sexual relationship… It still sucks.
I could go on with example after example but as a woman, the version of feminism that has become wildly popular on the internet does not resonate with me or represent me.

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